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Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his
scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a golden horn quietly cropping the
roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still
asleep and woke her. There's a unicorn in the garden, he said. Eating roses.
She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him. The unicorn is a mythical
beast, she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs
and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; now he was browsing among
the tulips. Here, unicorn, said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it
to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a
unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. The
unicorn, he said,ate a lily. His wife sat up in bed and looked at him coldly.
You are a booby, she said, and I am going to ...Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his
scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a golden horn quietly cropping the
roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still
asleep and woke her. There's a unicorn in the garden, he said. Eating roses.
She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him. The unicorn is a mythical
beast, she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs
and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; now he was browsing among
the tulips. Here, unicorn, said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it
to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a
unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. The
unicorn, he said,ate a lily. His wife sat up in bed and looked at him coldly.
You are a booby, she said, and I am going to have you put in the
booby-hatch. The man, who had never liked the words booby and booby-hatch,
and who liked them even less on a shining morning when there was a unicorn in
the garden, thought for a moment. We'll see about that, he said. He walked
over to the door. He has a golden horn in the middle of his forehead, he told
her. Then he went back to the garden to watch the unicorn; but the unicorn had
gone away. The man sat down among the roses and went to sleep. ? ?? ???And As soon as the husband had gone out of the house, the
wife got up and dressed as fast as she could. She was very excited and there was
a gloat in her eye. She telephoned the police and she telephoned a psychiatrist;
she told them to hurry to her house and bring a strait-jacket. When the police
and the psychiatrist arrived they sat down in chairs and looked at her, with
great interest. My husband, she said, saw a
unicorn this morning. The police looked at the psychiatrist and the
psychiatrist looked at the police. He told me it ate a lilly, she said. The
psychiatrist looked at the police and the police looked at the psychiatrist. He
told me it had a golden horn in the middle of its forehead, she said. At a
solemn signal from the psychiatrist, the police leaped from their chairs and
seized the wife. They had a hard time subduing her, for she put up a terrific
struggle, but they finally subdued her. Just as they got her into the
strait-jacket, the husband came back into the house. ? ?? ???Did you tell your wife you saw a unicorn? asked the
police. Of course not, said the husband. The unicorn is a mythical beast.
That's all I wanted to know, said the psychiatrist. Take her away. I'm sorry,
sir, but your wife is as crazy as a jaybird. So they
took her away, cursing and screaming, and shut her up in an institution. The
husband lived happily ever after. ? ?? ???Moral:
Don't count your boobies until they are hatched.